What kind of fishery is this?
I’ve been having a quiet whinge to myself lately about how utterly boring The Namibian newspaper has become. They keep running dreadfully dreary articles about local government elections, or treason trials being postponed. I rely on the newspaper to give me inspiration in times of blogging crisis, and recently I’m afraid it’s let me down.
However, I came in this morning, and saw a headline that gladdened my heart: “Namibia makes debut at world fish fair”. Now I don’t know why, but I find fish inherently amusing. I think I may have mentioned this before. The fact that there is an international fish fair I find delightful. I can imagine them all dressed like Captain Birdseye, sitting around on their stands, surrounded by tuna steaks and caviar, and discussing the dreadful state of the pilchard harvest.
It appears, however, that the International Seafood Expo is a big deal. People come from all over to display the latest fish products, be it the food itself or the technology used to catch it. It’s the place to wheel and deal if you’re in the fish business.
Namibia doesn’t really do fish. Except for pilchards. They’re very big on tinned pilchards. In fact, I believe that Namibia donated a large amount of tinned pilchards to the victims of the tsunami. I kid you not.
Anyway, this is what the Namibian contingent had to say about the visit:
“We had a small stand and no fish. All we had was our confidence in Namibia’s existing fishing industry and prospective aquaculture sector as our point of promotion.
“Miss Namibia 2004, Adele Basson, was also with us and with the support of Namibia Breweries, plus our wooden giraffes, we were able to market our products while being able to offer the visitors to our stand true Namibian beer with true Namibian beauty and some culture.”
Those of you who have not visited Namibia will not realise the significance of the wooden giraffe in Namibian culture. They are the bait used to reel tourists into market stalls. I’m sure the sale of wooden giraffes feeds families from here to Katima Mulilo. They are everywhere. If you go to the check-in gates at the airport, I guarantee you that at least half of the people getting on planes will have enormous wooden giraffes wrapped up in bubblewrap and newspaper sticking awkwardly out of their baggage.
Why exactly they took wooden giraffes to a seafood expo escapes me though. What were they trying to achieve? I can just see it…
“Hello sir. Here, have a Windhoek lager. It’s true Namibian beer!”
“Wow! Thanks. What’s different about true Namibian beer?”
“Well, it’s exactly the same as German beer, except the girl serving it to you is a true Namibian beauty. Albeit of German extraction.”
“Oh marvellous. What kind of fish products are you promoting?”
“Fish products?”
“Yes. That’s why we’re all here.”
“Right. Well, I don’t know about that, but don’t you think these wooden giraffes represent our burgeoning fishing industry extraordinarily well?”
“…..”
May 30th, 2007 at 1:38 pm
this made me chuckle. tuck one (a giraffe that is) under your arm at the show and tell session of the returned volunteer weekend, you’ll go down a treat.. wonder if miss namibia 2004 was wearing ‘closed’ shoes..
May 30th, 2007 at 1:51 pm
ROFL! Hey I get Windhoek and Windhoek Lite here in UK. Also get the pilchards at Waitrose, Sainsbury and Tesco.
The canned pilchards are fast movers too . The shelves keep getting replenished. I know someone, (a true Brit) who loves them stright out the can!
May 30th, 2007 at 2:29 pm
Namibia doesn’t do fish? Get thee to Kuki’s in Swakop young lady.
May 30th, 2007 at 2:30 pm
It sounds like a Monty Python’s Flying Circus sketch.
Maybe the president of the fishing industry is an adept of nonsense humor.
May 30th, 2007 at 2:37 pm
Mel, I will do that. I may also take a giant wooden hippo with me. You know, just to sit on. Is ‘closed shoes’ an odd phrase?
Robert – it’s good to know I can continue to drink Windhoek lager on my return home. I’m quite partial.
Clare, ok they do fish in Swakop and Walvis bay, and probably Luderitz too (I know they do crayfish in Luderitz). But you have to admit that fish is not a big part of the average Namibian’s diet.
Uncle Did – I hope so, for their sake.
May 30th, 2007 at 4:19 pm
I’m not ashamed to say I have a wooden representative of Namibia’s burgeoning fish industry sitting in my bedroom. And to think I had no idea of all that he stood for until just now!
May 30th, 2007 at 4:59 pm
I knew you would have! Brilliant. I’m going to take one home too. I love them.
May 30th, 2007 at 10:28 pm
Ok I laughed out loud at that one. I guess you do the best you can with what you have, if there is a Fish Fair you display whatever is handy. Who knew that there even was such a thing as a Fish Fair and why would they have it in a country that doens’t even Fish or eat a whole lot of Fish. Also, I can’t figure out why they would even call it a “Fair”. I’ll have to add this to my list of “mysteries of life” I actually have some of those giraffes.
May 30th, 2007 at 11:55 pm
Goodness me you write well. Bah. Another blogger to be jealous of!
May 31st, 2007 at 11:10 am
Kathleen – I know! A fish fair! It is a little bit ridiculous. It wasn’t here though – it was in Belgium.
Moobs – hello! and thanks!