Pick me! Pick me!
This year is an election year in our small yet obstreperous country.
It appears that it will be characterised by the usual sniping and back-biting between Labour and the Conservatives, while poor old Charles Kennedy pops his head up occasionally and says something bland. I will state my politics for the record – I’m unashamedly a Liberal Democrat. I hope Charles Kennedy tries a little harder this year to say things that are controversial so that people will at least notice that he’s there, but then it’s a bit difficult if you’re leader of the only party that has sensible policies. In my opinion.
This year it will also be characterised by a smouldering resentment between our PM, the smiling and untrustworthy Tony Blair, and our Chancellor of the Exchequer, Gordon Brown. GB wants Tony’s job, you see, and as far as he is concerned, he was promised it. I told you Tony was untrustworthy. He’ll be making himself Lifetime Dictator next, and will invade Gaul against the wishes of his country. Oh, sorry. That was Julius Caesar.
I sometimes wonder about politics in this country. It seems to me that it resembles squabbles in a children’s playground more than grown men and women discussing policies that will affect matters on a global level, as well as for this country. I have no faith in either of the main contenders, whose leanings seem to me to be alarmingly similar. I think that TB is just annoyed because the Conservatives have already bagged the best party name, and he’s stuck with New Labour, which, frankly, smacks of pandering to the unions, and arguments over the minimum wage.
Now, I have to go and tend to the Beast. It’s got another puncture, and this time I have to go out and fix it myself, armed with nothing but a pair of spoons and a first aid kit. Mr Men plaster anyone?