The environmentally friendly Beast
I’ve had a revelation. And because I am in tonight, and I can’t help myself, I’m on here again, blogging away. I’m a bit worried that it’s becoming a consuming obsession, thinking of things to post, and it’s not healthy.
Anyway, when I was cycling home this evening I noticed a whole load of broken glass glinting in my headlights. Concerned for the Beast’s new inner tube, I began asking myself who is responsible for sweeping the detritus of car crime from our streets during the night. Whoever it is isn’t doing a very good job. It looked as if bicycle saboteurs had spent an industrious afternoon scattering little pieces of car window as comprehensively across the cycle bit of the road as possible.
Anyway, as I swerved yet again into the path of the car behind me in an effort to avoid another puncture incident, it occurred to me. The Buddhist Bicyle! Convenient for concerned puncture-victims, while also bringing peace of mind to confirmed Buddhists by sweeping insects and small mammals from your path, unharmed and free to live another day. I’m going to buy a broom and attach it to my handlebars. I will invent a mechanism which will use the movement of my legs to swish the broom from left to right, clearing my path, and ensuring that my puncture worries are no more.
Just you watch. In a couple of months time I will be ruling the world. It’s inevitable.